via flickr by jesse.millan
I received an email last night from a sweet reader — it really touched a chord in my own heart. She had been reading some of my posts about my aspirations as a young girl and sent me an email sharing a bit about her own life:
Here are a few lines from her note:
I am a grown up and somewhere along the line I stopped going into that place in my own mind where grace and casual elegance lived. Things around here are in a dismal state of affairs. Really, my life is a little past the half way mark and I would truly like to live some of it the way my “little girl” imagined.
You have spurred me on to reach into my past and all the dreams and wonders of “how it would be when I became a grown up.”
She asked me how to start to live the life she imagined she would live. I’d love to help encourage her, I think this is something many of us can relate to.
So I am asking you, dear friends (especially those of you who are out of the ‘dreaming’ and well into the ‘real life’ phase!):
Do you ever go back in time to think about those little girl dreams
of what life would be like when you grew up?
via flickr by Jolante
I’m certain most of us didn’t imagine the struggles we’d face, the hardships we endure or all the dreams we’d set aside along the way. I’ll admit, being an adult is WAY more exhausting than I imagined! It is messier, more complicated, more frustrating and a lot louder that what I pictured in my dreams (I have three kids so peace is not something I often find, at least in this phase of my life!).
I know my own dreams of adult life probably looked a little more like a fairytale than reality. But why is that? Did I dream of beautiful things beyond my reach, things that are no longer possible for me, or do I simply LET those beautiful things slip out of my grasp in a frenzy of the urgent tasks of every day life? I tend to think I let them go.
How can we bring those moments of beauty and grace to our life, even as life hurls frustrations, stress, all sorts of messes, financial pressures and worries at us?
Where do we begin if we have lost sight
of our little girl dreams?
♥
1Begin with some time in solitude.
Find a quiet place to dream. When life spirals out of control and I lose sight of what I love about life, I usually find I haven’t taken any time out for solitude. I need to get away to be alone with my thoughts and to pray.
2 Get a journal and make lists of things you used to love.
The simple process of writing things down makes a big difference for me in finding clarity of thought. Seeing the things I love on a list makes everything feel possible and doable. I love to make lists like my 20 Little Things to jumpstart my thinking.
3 Create daily and weekly rituals out of things you love.
Find ways to incorporate in to your life those things you love most. Make embracing them a regular part of living — don’t let any one or any thing stand in the way! When you take the things you love and elevate them to a daily or weekly ritual you’ll find all the more pleasure in them as you look forward to those experiences on a regular basis!
4 Slow down.
Fill your days with activities that slow you down (yes, the opposite of what we tend to do!) and allow you to appreciate and savor moments of beauty.
5 Embrace simplicity.
Life as we know it is continually filled with new and complicated things. Our phones, our computers, our calendars, our TVs, even our washer and dryer seem to require an advanced degree to be able to use them. And those are the things invented to make life better and easier! Just when we master some new electronic gadget, they crash or the new model comes out and we are frustrated again.
Move away from the complicated as often as possible and enjoy things in their simplest, purest forms. Go back to some of the rituals and pleasures your grandmother might have enjoyed, before life moved into the fast lane.
6 Live life on purpose — dare to incorporate the things you love into your life.
You can do this! Being an adult doesn’t just mean we can have dessert before dinner and stay up until 10PM. It means we can live out the things we’ve always wanted to do.
Beautiful post! I usually don’t comment because I always seem to be saying the same as dozens of other delighted readers, but I realised that shouldn’t stop me from saying thank you.
When I was a wee girl, I longed to be a writer, from the moment I could hold a pencil, my mum told me that’s all I ever wanted to be. (There were signs back then that I was destined to be a mum and a homemaker, too, as I designed, built and decorated everything from shoe box houses for Cindy dolls to tree houses in the neighbouring woods!) I let that wee girl down by gradually listening to the well meaning advice I got from all the adults in my life about the difficulties of earning a living from writing. It may be too late for me to earn a living from it now, but at least by blogging, I’ve found a way to write for pleasure and reach people. It may also have been my destiny not start off by being a writer; as a homelife coach who used to be a translator and teacher, I’ve been able to tap into all sorts of experiences to help others become writers and make their dreams come true.
I have a daughter who longs to be a writer and I will do my best never to let anyone trample on her dreams.
janice|Sharing the Journeys inspiring blog post..Birds, Bees and Blogging
I am so glad you commented today! It is never too late to pick up your dreams! The fact that I am blogging about everything I love is a fulfillment of a dream for me. And I didn’t even know what a blog was two years ago!
I didn’t set out to blog, and never imagined that was how I would live the life I loved, but my dreams caught up with me in unexpected ways!
Thank you so much, Melissa, for this inspiring post. We women often need to be reminded to take some time for ourselves and focus on our dreams. I have tried to do that over the last several years, which has resulted in a obtaining college certificate in Decorating at 49 while continuing to work full time. Of course, you wouldn’t exactly qualify that as “slowing down”, but when my two adult daughters and husband watch as I receive my certificate later this week, I know that I will definitely have achieved one of my dreams.
If I was to go back to my little girl days, I could with certainty say that this wasn’t one of the dreams I had. But I think, for some of us, the realization of what our dreams are evolve as our lives do. And as precious as little girl dreams are, they aren’t seasoned with life’s spices – good and bad. Sometimes, we need to be able to go with the flow and adapt our dreams to accomodate what live throws at us.
Thank you for the opportunity to be able to put this into words. Sometimes stopping to think about where you are in life can be extremely rewarding!
donna @ dh designss inspiring blog post..Project advances….
Wow… thank you for that!
I put a huge smile on my face here at work… I’m ready for that fairytale…
I’ll come back and link my post
I love this post! This has been on my mind alot lately.. feeling too frenzied and busy and like life is passing way to fast.. I am now working toward slowing down a bit more, taking on less stuff to do and finding ways to “stop and smell the roses.”
Lisas inspiring blog post..cloth diaper contest
This is a beautiful post Melissa. I simply love it. The photos are perfection. I think the key word for this whole concept is “dare”. It can be scary and sad to think back on those dreams and weigh them against reality. But it is so important because those dreams speak to how we were created, before fear and age and worry settled into the cracks on our wrinkled foreheads. I think this is so important to pay attention to. So thank you.
emilys inspiring blog post..the letter
This post didn’t hit just a chord with me, it blasted it!
Found this quote not too long ago, and I keep it by my bedside to read often:
“It’s never too late to be what you might have been.” –George Eliot
I absolutely love this post. I can identify completely. I’m just glad that the Lord doesn’t reveal our future to us or I might have run away. He wants us to take one day at a time in step with Him. Too often I didn’t do that and chose my own path. Lessons learned the hard way.
I think I need to email you Melissa. You always seem to hit on things I’m dealing with.
Hugs,
Debbie
Melissa! What did I ever do without you?!?!? I found your blog yesterday and bought your ebook and now I’m inspired by this post!
When I was a little girl, I wanted my entire life to be “MODERN”. After having Hurricane Andrew destroy my home in 1992, that changed to me treasuring vintage things and antiques. My home is an old-fashioned home that I love but want to make better (white kitchen, anyone?).
Thank you so much for you and sharing your inspiration with us. God bless you.
Alison
Alison recently posted..New Decorating Blog!