
Once upon a time, I was definitely a reluctant entertainer. I wasn’t reluctant about having people over, though, I was reluctant to have them over for dinner. I didn’t know how to cook anything that resembled what I thought was a “guest worthy dinner.” I was intimidated by friends who made delicious four course sit down dinners, always had their houses clean, and would never put the salad plate where the bread plate was supposed to go. It was just all too much for me.

I knew I’d never measure up to my own expectations of what I thought “having guests for dinner” meant. In order to hide my lack of confidence — and quite honestly to hide my lack of desire to gain gourmet cooking skills, I would throw Make Your Own Pizza parties, Ice Cream Sundae parties, and Taco Salad bars. Cause I am fancy like that.
If it was easy to make and preferably if people had to assemble it themselves, I was safe. I mean, if your ice cream sundae tasted awful it was your own fault. Right? Right. BRILLIANT I tell ya!
Looking back, I now realize there should have been no shame in any of my attempts at entertaining. At the time I felt I was an epic fail as a hostess, even though in hindsight I was just trying to find a way to have people over that was manageable for me and allowed me to let go of unrealistic expectations (and let’s be honest here, I wanted to be able to spend more time decorating than I spent cooking! Soooo true, I cannot make this stuff up. )
Little did I know my desire to focus on authenticity over perfection in entertaining and decorating, {and my passion for creating ambience in decorating over the task of preparing a gourmet meal in a kitchen}, would someday lead to this blog The Inspired Room. Clearly I would never be writing a cooking blog. AND The Inspired Room would lead me to some of my best friends in the whole wide web world, Sandy and Nester, and the three of us would write a book about ourselves called The Reluctant Entertainer.
OK, that last part is a lie.
Sandy is the only one who wrote the book. But you knew that.
I just feel pretty special to see my name on the back, even though I knew it was going to be there. And this weekend was the first time I had actually seen it in real life!!

I took this picture at night holding it up to my camera. And somehow a black smudge got on the book and I didn’t even notice until just now.
I might have written 20 bazillion blog posts over the years but I have never written a book. So it might be a small thing to celebrate, but I am SO EXCITED to have my name on a book! ESPECIALLY on the back of THIS ONE, right next to my pal Nester. Nester and I completely and wholeheartedly believe in the message Sandy shares:
Entertaining is not about perfection, it is about connection.


Giveaway: Book, Apron & Tea Towel
TWO lucky winners.
To celebrate my dear friend Sandy’s new book, today I am giving away a copy of The Reluctant Entertainer to TWO lucky winners and if that is not so amazing by itself, each winner will ALSO receive a beautiful demi pink sorbet apron and tea towel (pictured above) from The Hip Hostess! SOOO adorable, you will totally want to have a party just to wear this apron and set out your tea towel. And with your handy dandy guide from Sandy on how to make entertaining doable, you’ll be all set to invite people over tomorrow night!
If you want to buy a copy of Sandy’s book for yourself or for a gift, you can find it here in my amazon store! This book is truly amazing and inspiring, you really will love it! I promise!
To enter this giveaway, leave a comment here about your most embarrassing entertaining story or your biggest reluctance in having people over. Then go let your friends know about the giveaway on Facebook, Twitter and your blog and come back to let me know where you posted about this and you’ll get extra entries!
Giveaway is now closed!
Hi, I'm Melissa. This is where I share inspiration for creating a simple, authentic and beautiful home.





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I think I want to have everything perfect; food, table, conversation, home. It’s easier just not to do it.
Debbie´s last blog ..In Other Words Tuesday Waiting
I think I would love to entertain if I didn’t have so many insecurities! Our place is small, kitchen tiny, outdoor patio too close to doggie potty spot, and I really want to make people comfortable. What if they feel awkward in my house?!!?
Haha. someday. Someday I won’t care…
It was my first dinner party. I had the table set so that Martha Stewart would be proud. I even made time for me to be freshly showered and full makeup on. The house smelled wonderful. I had fresh baked homemade rolls. The cake was perfect on the platter for dessert. Everything was on the table except for the chicken. It was perfect, well so I thought. So the chicken hits the table and we start in on it and every single piece of chicken is raw on the inside.. Sometime among all my preparing I never thought to see if the crock-pot was working. I later figured out it had blown a fuse and the outlet stopped working. It turned out to be a meatless meal. I was mortified who serves RAW chicken? Apparently I did.
Nikki´s last blog ..Cupcake Stencil
I wrote a blog post about the giveaway on Heart Choices.
I also created a widget that I posted for anyone who has read the book to give feedback.
Debbie´s last blog ..The Reluctant Entertainer
Embarassing moment was having the main course OVER cooked! Thankfully there was enough sides, drinks to make up for it. Anyway, I guess I’d add this as being a hang up for my not inviting friends and family over very often.
Biggest fear? That guests will be bored. Really. Bored. Thanks for the great giveaway. Blessings, SusanD
SusanD´s last blog ..Its Giveaway Day!!!!
When I was a newlywed, my groom and I invited friends over for canned beans and hot dogs boiled stovetop. I forgot all about the food cooking and burned everything to a crisp. That was 36 years ago and I am a fine entertainer now
Oh my gosh, my best story comes from just a week ago. At around 4:30 p.m. that Friday afternoon my dear hubby invited the neighbors over for dinner at 6 p.m. (a rare event). Well, I was still holding the baby I provide child care for but happily agreed. “That will be fun”, I thought. Until I realized there was dog hair and cobwebs and mess all over the house. As soon as baby got picked up (around 5), I started screaming and yelling that EVERYONE had better start cleaning and not just sitting there any longer. I got out the vacuum while the kids started hauling junk to their rooms. I told hubby to stay in the kitchen and cook while I huffed and puffed around the house with vacuum cleaner in hand. Boy, was I steaming and regretting that we’d invited them over. Then, at 5:15 I heard a knock at the door. A young man was standing there and I thought to myself (“oh, cr*p! It’s that kid selling knives!). Yes, I had made an appt. with him, to “help” him with his new job, and forgotten about it. So there I was, vacuum in hand and job not done, having to stash it all away and sit down to hear a presentation on knives which I had no intention of buying. At some point I broke free and whispered to hubby, “keep cooking and call the neighbors to come 1/2 an hour later!”.
In the end, having to sit and listen to this kid try to sell me knives for an hour calmed me down. The food was cooked and delicious. The house was “clean enough” and I drank maybe one glass of wine more than usual (two instead of one, I’m not much of a drinker) and was able to relax just fine. I went from eager entertainer to reluctant entertainer to someone who had a great time in spite of it all.
I also shared this on Facebook.
Lisa Z´s last blog ..So Much For That Idea
I try to have everything perfect….even if it means staying up the entire night before…then I am too exhausted to enjoy anything or anybody….I know….ridiculous….but sad, too….would love a chance to win this book….
Karen´s last blog ..Simple Joys – An Awakening
I think my most embarrassing moment would be shortly after my husband and I were married we decided to have a little housewarming back yard party. Well I had some bff’s over and they had brought some wine and helped me get everything together. By the time the rest of the guests had arrived I was pretty toasted. Well I had gotten so consumed in conversation I had forgotten about the pies I had baking. The kitchen began smoking and all of our fire alarms started going off and since we were all in the back yard and didnt hear them , the fire department showed up. I was so embarrassed and to this day my husband still brings that up at dinner parties. I didnt catch the house on fire , just a whole lot of smoke and a couple of charcoal pies , thank God.
Katie´s last blog ..Cookies Kids
I tweeted this @kasexton
Katie´s last blog ..Cookies Kids
Yes, it was I who thought it was a lovely idea to invite the neighbors over for dinner; after all, we had already invited them for wine earlier in the day. Why not dinner to go with it? It was all pretty much as Lisa described above, including the vacuuming and ranting and the visit from the knife saleskid. Once she told me to “just stay in the kitchen and cook,” I was fine, I just kept working. It was amazing watching her accept her fate and calmly sit and listen when there were probably 37 other things she might find to stress about, but couldn’t at that point. In the end, I think we enjoyed our dinner(spicy fish with arugula, beets and green beans from the garden and ice cream with berries from the yard) with two of our many terrific neighbors. It might not be the last time we invite folks over for dinner, but I hope it is the last time we do it under those conditions!
Biggest fear, or REASON for “hesitation” has been: this house has been an “extreme makeover” in the works for several years. What was supposed to take “Two Weeks” (hubby says he’ll never live that one down LOL) has taken five years! But, thank the Lord, we’ve gotten past the “no-kitchen-counters-or cabinets; knocked out walls” phase. The house is big enough to have a special gathering…and thankfully we were able to enjoy our extended families here together at Christmas—which leads me to my FIASCO—Being up on my feet almost non-stop, for several days leading up to Christmas Eve (2009) in order to “provide the most perfect Christmas ambiance and neatly organized buffet in the dining area,” I ended up in the ER! Yep…my back went out..thank the Lord it went out the day AFTER Christmas, when everyone had their tummies full! LOL My husband says, “never again! You ‘over-did’ it!” I say, “Oh please! Give me one more chance!” LOL It was so much fun cooking, cleaning, preparing and especially watching everyone enjoying themselves. HOWEVER, I hope to get my eager hands on a copy of this book soon. Maybe it will help keep me balanced and OUT of the ER this Christmas season! Thanks for the chance!
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